Thoughts on Org Behavior Ch. 9-10

Stress and communication are topics that influence each other in profound ways. Each of us in our lives must deal with some levels of stress, and each of us is likely to respond differently. As with most issues in the human relations world, recognizing and accepting the conditions in which one finds oneself are the first steps to taking action in improving the circumstance or your response to the circumstance.

The physiological and psychological effects of stress are related to a much older system - that of "fight or flight". When threatened, all animals (including humans) have a fundamental choice to make : stay or run. In either situation, the body begins to accelerate all its systems in preparation for survival. In our industrial world, the choices are different, but the reactions are the same. More adrenaline; faster heart beat; tenser muscles. But the release of those tendencies is not as immediate - you can't always knock down your co-worker to prove your point or run away and climb a tree to safety. So what can you do?

First, recognize that you are faced with a stressful situation and accept the idea that you can do something about your reactions. Stand up. Walk around. Ask for a few minutes to respond, reply, etc. The important idea here is to take action - physical action. You don't need to become hostile or angry - just move. The physical release will begin to reduce the impact of the additional adrenaline created by the perception of a threat.

Second, get more information. No matter what the issue, ask questions. Who, what, where, when, how, why. This action will do a couple of things for you - one, you'll gain some time while the other person is talking; two, you will gain information and a better understanding of the situation.

Three - take action. Once you have gathered yourself and calmed yourself, decide on a course of action and follow it. This requires that you have the info and have checked your assumptions and the facts as you know them. Make a plan to correct the situation; change your mind about the situation; change the structure of the situation; remove yourself from the situation; and/or accept the situation - whichever is appropriate and/or possible.

Do not sit and stew over the situation. Action is the key. Your body and several million years of evolutionary development demand action.

Finally, communicate, communicate, communicate. Effectively communicating your position and seeking to understand the other person's position will help. Effective communication takes practice. Language is a behavior like any other and will improve with practice. In times of crisis or change, more communication is always better than less communication - even if you don't have the final answer, keep asking questions and giving information (as long as it is accurate information). You don't help yourself by shutting yourself off from the rest of the team or the boss.

In this process, take the time to figure out your communication and conflict response strengths and weaknesses. The more you know about yourself and how you respond to circumstances, the better able you will be to manage difficult conversations and situations.

Remember, rarely is anything so critical that a life depends on the outcome (unless you work in hospitals).